Many LGBTQ+ people grow up surrounded by heteronormative messages about gender, sexuality, masculinity, and what is considered “acceptable.” Even when we consciously reject those ideas as adults, some of those messages can still become internalised and quietly shape the way we think about ourselves and other queer people.
Internalised homophobia can show up in subtle and unexpected ways — through shame, self criticism, discomfort around visibility, fear of judgement, or even hearing the critical voices of parents, peers, or society echoing inside our own minds. Often, these responses are less about who we truly are and more about the environments we had to survive in growing up.
In this video, I reflect on my own experience of recognising internalised homophobia in real time, how those inherited messages can continue to influence us, and why challenging them can become an important part of healing, authenticity, and self acceptance.
If any of this resonates with you and you’d like support exploring it further, I offer LGBTQ+ affirming therapy both online and in person from my practice in Manchester city centre. You’re welcome to get in touch to arrange a free 15 minute introductory call.